The F Word every spouse needs to use

It's the word FORGIVE...what do you think we meant?! 

Forgiveness is the tool every marriage toolbox needs for one simple reason - we are imperfect spouses who occasionally hurt each other. We don't mean to but, we say things we shouldn't and don't do things we should, which cause ruptures in our marriage that need repair. Forgiveness is the repair tool.

On An Intentional Marriage podcast we talk about the importance of asking for and extending forgiveness along with what forgiveness is and what it's not. We also lay out the path forgiveness takes toward reconnection using the

4 R's of a proper apology:

RESPONSIBILITY - taking responsibility for the action and feeling it caused. I'm sorry for spending too much time on my phone and making you feel ignored.

REGRET - expressing how sorry you are for hurting your spouse that way. I feel sad that I hurt you and made you feel like that.

REPAIR - offer to repair in a way that's meaningful to your spouse. What can I do to make this up to you?

REQUEST - make the request by actually saying the words, "Will you forgive me?"

The last step is important because, ultimately, forgiveness is a choice. It's a choice for the hurt spouse to release bitterness, resentment and anger and replace it with undeserved grace and love. Extending forgiveness is not something that comes naturally or is necessarily easy but, with God's help, it is possible and together we can take the proper steps toward reconnection... one Marriage Minute Monday at a time.