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How to have your BEST Valentines Day

My love for music causes me to act in ways some consider inappropriate....and by “some” I mean my teenage daughter.

I can’t help that I love a chorus with a solid crescendo that stirs my emotions…it practically begs me to sing along! A beautiful melody can move me to the point where I abandon all rationale and live uninhibited in the moment. I guess I just need to be more selective as to when and where…and standing at the counter of Five Guys is not the time to express my passion for classic 80’s music.

Madi, my fifteen-year-old, did not appreciate me singing along (while pretending to hold a microphone and use sweeping arm movements) to the song that was being piped through the restaurant’s speakers. She sat at the table and I could tell by her raised eyebrows she was not sharing in the moment. I retrieved our order and sat down. “Mother,” she said in a condescending tone, “your life is not a musical. You do not need to break out in song constantly!” I jokingly defended my position as I explained the girl behind the counter threw extra fries in our bag and said she enjoyed my visit.

I happen to love a lot of things; music is just one of them. I also love the feel of a new book while running my hand across the pretty cover. I love Mackinaw Island fudge ice cream - especially in a waffle cone. I love watching bright red cardinals flit about under the pine tree in our front yard. I love holding a newborn baby and kissing its smooth cheek. I love the smell of lavender, lilacs and the sound of a crackling fire. I love listening to the pitter pat of rain outside my window as I nestle in and enjoy a warm cup of coffee.

I find it a bit strange, however, to say I love all these things and I love my husband too. It’s a confusing word that gets tossed around like a set of car keys. It seems there should be a different word to differentiate my love for my husband over things like books, birds and babies. How does my husband know my love for him is different than my love for music or ice cream?

Genuine love backs up its words with action. Our love ought not be expressed only in what we say but proved by what we do. Setting aside my own needs and wants to put my spouse first is evidence of my love and commitment that I promised until “death do us part.”

Everyone has a love language and when we figure out what speaks love to our spouse we know how to act in a meaningful way that best communicates our love. Perhaps they like receiving gifts, hearing an affirming word, or snuggling into a warm embrace. Others simply enjoy spending time together or appreciate a thoughtful act - like folding laundry or emptying the dishwasher. If you want to make this Valentine’s Day your BEST one yet, find out your spouse’s love language. You could discover the one thing that drastically improves your relationship…it might make you feel like singing!

“Let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.” ~1 John 3:18

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